My nursing story is slightly different from many of the nurses I know. "From the time I was little, I knew I wanted to be a nurse " is not something that resonated with me. In fact, When all my friends in high school spoke about their goals for the future, I felt sad and concerned because I had not figured it out yet. Everyone was always surprised that I had no idea what I wanted to do because I always got good grades and was top of my class. I think the pressure from everyone else added to my anxiety about my future. I knew I loved science and spent much of my time watching medical shows and reading pathology books that my cousin (now a forensic scientist) left around the house. I brainstormed ideas like “Maybe I’ll go to med school" or "Maybe I'll become a pathologist or a scientist like my cousin.” I even considered being a mortician because I had crippling anxiety and thought a job with limited interaction with people would be easier for me (crazy, I know). My mom is a nurse and wanted me to be a nurse, but when I was younger, I never considered it a possible profession.
One day my entire mindset changed. I cared for a sick loved one, and they told me I would make a great nurse. I felt happy and proud to be able to help them during one of the worst times in their life. Seeing how happy I made them brought me joy. Watching them develop strength and energy filled me with a sense of pride. I then decided to apply to nursing school after high school.
I received my BSN in nursing in 2015. Once I graduated, I was faced with another dilemma. What specialty do I want to do? What type of nurse do I want to be? All of my nursing school friends had already decided; whether it be L&D, NICU , or ER, they all had an idea of the areas they loved. Again, I felt I had no direction of where I wanted my life to go. That's until yet another life event steered me in a different direction. I was interviewing for jobs and was stuck between two positions. A beloved aunt was unexpectedly diagnosed with a brain tumor during this time. I felt lost, confused, and upset at the world. At that moment, I chose the Neuro ICU nursing fellowship and went into the neurosurgery specialty. I wanted to be able to advocate for my aunt and also educate myself in an area that intimidated me.
After a few years in the ICU, I went on to work in the neuroendovascular suites in Interventional Radiology. While I was in IR, I received my FNP from PACE University. After graduating from NP school, I loved neurosurgery and decided to continue working in the specialty. My first NP job out of school was with two outstanding neurosurgeons, and the knowledge I gained during my time with them was incomparable. Due to an unforeseen closer in that department, I had to think of my next move. It allowed me to explore an area I was interested in, aesthetics. I now practice aesthetics full-time and maintain a per diem / prn job in an outpatient neurosurgery clinic. I am also in the works to obtain my Doctor of Nursing Practice degree (DNP).
Some of the things I wish I knew when I started are that I didn't have to be so hard on myself and to give myself grace. My best advice to newer nurses or NPs entering the field is to "give yourself grace ."It's okay not to have everything figured out right away. For those of us who did not pre-plan our careers ahead of time, we may feel lost and confused and just behind everyone else. My best friends always tell me that life will work out exactly how it is supposed to, and I genuinely believe that now.